Toasties and Jammies

havetardiswilltravel replied to your photo: Tumblr Crushes: havetardiswilltravel …

DANIELLE HOW DID THIS EVEN HAPPEN? DO YOU JUST STALK MY BLOG, READY TO POUNCE ON ANYTHING THAT I POST?

YEAH, PRETTY MUCH!

havetardiswilltravel asked: DANIELLE DANIELLE DANIELLE HOW DO YOU EVEN EXIST? BLOOPLA

WELL YOU SEE, CHARLBOT, WHEN A MAN AND A WOMAN LOVE EACH OTHER VERY MUCH THEY JUMP ON THE BED AND TALK ABOUT THEIR LOVE AND THAT LOVE OVERFLOWS INTO A FAIRY. THE FAIRY THEN FLIES TO NEVER NEVER LAND AND DOES EPIC BATTLE WITH CAPTAIN HOOK. IF THE FAIRY WINS, CAPTAIN HOOK GETS EATEN BY THE CROCODILE, WHO THEN SWIMS TO WONDERLAND. IT MEETS A DRUG ADDICTED CATERPILLAR AND FALLS IN LOVE WITH IT. THE CATERPILLAR THEN WRITES IT A POEM.

“How doth the little crocodile
Improve his shining tail,
And pour the waters of the Nile
On every golden scale! 

How cheerfully he seems to grin
How neatly spreads his claws,
And welcomes little fishes in,
With gently smiling jaws!”

THE CATERPILAR RECITES THE POEM TO ALICE, WHO THEN EATS A MUSHROOM AND BECOMES A GIANT. SHE WALKS TO MIDDLE EARTH AND THERE SHE IS SLAIN BY GIMLI, WHO TELLS LEGOLAS SHE COUNTS AS FIVE KILLS DUE TO HER MASSIVE SIZE. THE ELF THROWS A TANTRUM AND TATTLES TO BILBO. BILBO, WHO IS ACTUALLY JOHN WATSON IN THE WRONG UNIVERSE, IGNORES HIM AND CONTINUES ENJOYING HIS ELEVENSIES. SHERLOCK, UNIMPRESSED WITH THE EXTRA MEALS ADDED TO THE DAY, BECOMES BORED AND DECIDES TO TORTURE ANDERSON TO ENTERTAIN HIMSELF. ANDERSON IS SO FURIOUS THAT HE ACCIDENTALLY LAYS A DINOSAUR EGG. HE PUTS THE EGG UP FOR ADOPTION, AND THE DOCTOR SWINGS BY IN HIS TARDIS AND TAKES IT TO A LOVELY FAMILY. THE EGG HATCHES AND IF IT IS A DINOSAUR, THEY DONATE IT TO JURASSIC PARK, BUT IF IT IS A HUMAN THEY KEEP IT AND RAISE IT AS THEIR OWN. IF IT IS HALF DINO HALF HUMAN, THEY LOCK IT IN THE BASEMENT AND BUY IT A COMPUTER, SO THAT IT MAY LIVE OUT ITS DAYS ON TUMBLR.

And that, my dear Charlbot, is where babies come from.

LOL HAVETARDISWILLTRAVEL AND XXDOWNTHERABBITHOLEXX

xxdowntherabbitholexx:

rockinjanelle:

xxdowntherabbitholexx:

rockinjanelle:

I SAW THAT ASK.

BUT WHAT QUALITY? WHERE ARE YOU SEEING THIS ON MY BLOG I CAN’T EVEN.

QUALITY

YOU ASK WHERE QUALITY IS

JUST TAKE A LOOK AT YOUR TUMBLR.

YOUR TUMBLR IS FILLED WITH QUALITY.

DON’T YOU LIE TO ME.

I LOOK AT MY BLOG

AND

I SEE NOTHING.

AM I MISSING SOMETHING HERE OR—

I AM NOT LYING

I LOOK AT YOUR BLOG

AND  

I SEE QUALITY.

YOU’RE MISSING EVERYTHING.

QUALITY! QUALITY EVERYWHERE!

WE COULD ALL SWIM IN THE QUALITY!